Yeah, no.

Ever worked with someone who just made your life miserable? Who always misunderstood you, blamed you, expected you to read their mind, and made a big stink if things didn’t go exactly their way?

I’m sure you’re thinking of at least 3 people right now. 😅

Me too, friend, me. too.

I had a couple bosses like that, actually. Needless to say, I’m not working those respective jobs anymore because I said “yeah, no.”

No, you don’t get to treat me like crap.

No, I’m not going to read your mind.

No, you’re going to have to act like an actual adult if you want me to treat you like an adult. 😡 (Ok, I need to calm down.)

Your person is no exception

Whatever you call them - client, customer, etc - they don’t get to treat you like crap either. We say we wouldn’t put up with it, but then we take work because we don’t see any other opportunities coming our way.

NO MORE!

You can’t attract the person you DO want to work with if your mind and energy are cluttered up with the Karens of the world. 

(My apologies to anyone actually named Karen - all the Karens I’ve met have been absolutely lovely people. You go, girl.)

Your person doesn’t want to deal with Karens either.

If you’re surrounded by them, your ideal client will go in the opposite direction asap.

Time to break up

It’s kinda hokey, but it WORKS.

Break up with your Karens.

If you currently have clients that you don’t want to keep, either don’t upsell them to continue working with you and just let it fizzle out, or tell them that you’re taking your business in a new direction and you don’t think you’re the best person to fulfill their need anymore.

(Karma brownie points if you can refer them to someone who can legitimately help them - but no brownies whatsoever for trying to pawn them off on your competitors.)

Most important to break up with: imaginary Karen

Even before I had any clients at all, I found myself constantly addressing imaginary Karen in a kind of preemptive effort to head her off. 

Either I would write my blog posts as if I was trying to convince her why she should care about sustainable business and holistic health, or I would imagine all these epic conversations where I told her how wrong she was and she listened to me. (Def not happening in the real world lol 🤦)

So far, none of you have been Karens. (Yay! 🎉)

So why did I feel like I needed to constantly defend myself and my baby tree?

Probably some trauma I still need to work through…. Don’t worry, I’m working on it as we speak. But that takes a long time. And I didn’t want to stay stuck in this mindset because it made me not want to work at all.

And no wonder if I was expecting to have to deal with Karens!

We need to hear these words exactly

Sometimes we need the ceremonious-ness of a ritual to help us really grasp that something is happening.

The thing that worked for me was writing a statement. Not a letter exactly, more like a “Declaration of Independence from Karen.”

In my case, there was a specific person I know of online that I had originally thought was my ideal client. She was in the right niche, talking about the same sorts of things, successful… the whole nine yards.

But the more I imagined talking to her - creating content for her - the more I wanted to avoid the whole thing. I could only imagine her looking down on me, getting offended at my way of writing, and telling everyone she knows that I’m a fraud and a nobody.

Not so great for the creative juices, ya know?

So I broke up with her. 

I wrote a couple paragraphs stating that I’m not looking for people like her, not going to attempt to work with her, and wouldn't accept a partnership with her if she offered.

And I was FREEEEE!

Immediately after that - I’m talking a couple days - I realized who my ideal client REALLY is. I could totally see myself being best friends with her, hanging out at retreats, collaborating on products that will help hundreds of people, being excited to talk to you (I mean, her).

I haven’t looked back, friend. ☺️

🥅 Goals

1️⃣ Clear and non-negotiable statement of who you’d love to work with - your Evergreen Client.

2️⃣ Clearly defined levels of growth for your person to work through as they journey towards the final goal you help them achieve

3️⃣ A strategy for attracting them

👉 Coming Soon: Evergreen Clients course that helps you understand your ideal person, discover the journey you’re leading them on, and create a plan for giving them exactly what they need. Join the waitlist>>

👉 Check it Out: Magnetic Client Attraction Workbook

Streamline your messaging and content to align with your Evergreen Client and utilize the principles of magnetism to effortlessly attract them 😎 🎁 Download for free - my gift to you!>>

📋To Do

WRITE

• Write out a statement breaking up with your Karens.
• If there’s a specific person you’re thinking of, call them out by name.
• You can use the template below as a starting point, but please go all out and add every single annoying, disgusting, offensive thing you’re not going to put up with anymore

WONDER

• Give yourself some space to realize who your ideal client actually is
• Go for a walk, take a long shower, do some word association or coloring or puzzles - this will create brain space for an epiphany
• If you don’t know right away, no worries. Maybe you just haven’t met them yet

READ

• For a practical, hands on activity, read >>this article<< about the principles of magnetism and how we can truly attract the people we want into our lives just by being ourselves.

DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE FROM KAREN - TEMPLATE

I (your name here), hereby declare that I don’t want to be friends with [name of Karen here]. 

S/he is:

• Reason why you don’t think you’re compatible
• Reason why they annoy the snot out of you
• Reason why you don’t trust them

I will not waste time and energy speaking to the people I DON’T want to work with, trying to convince them to see things my way, or trying to convert the reluctant.

I don’t have to prove myself to them.

I don’t need to win the approval of skeptics in order to be valid.

I don’t give up on the people who need help, but a scorner actively refuses help.

From this point forward, I choose to only work with people who are respectful, care about what I have to say, and are ready to accept help.

Signed: _____________

Date:

👉 This exercise is part of the Seedling Level Mini-Course & Workbook.

Psst! Tired of wasting time on stuff that doesn't work?

Don’t keep guessing what your business needs! Find out exactly what level you’re at, your strengths and challenges, and the things to focus on (and what NOT to focus on) - today! 👇